USA Today reminds us that imperfections can “bring life together perfectly.” Craig Wilson writes (excerpt): But what I was most pleased to learn is that wabi sabi pertains to people, too — that you accept each other, even when they…
“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.” (Mark Twain): How not to bug the judge
The ABA Journal reports on dress codes for courtrooms and bans on: pajamas, saggy pants, exposed undergarments, bare feet, curlers, gang clothes, muscle shirts, tank tops, halters, bare midriffs, miniskirts (hemlines more than 4 inches above the knee), excessive, uncovered…
A heart for giving: Robert J. Dugan
The Grand Rapids Press notes the passing of attorney Bob Dugan. Heidi Fenton writes (excerpt): Robert Dugan loved being involved with his community, a trait he built on for decades since signing onto the downtown law firm Rhoades McKee in…
“Being there is 80 percent of the job”–Chris Rock on Fathers
USA Today shows how “non-resident” dads who don’t live with their children are staying involved with them. Half of all children will spend part of their lives living apart from their fathers. Sharon Jayson writes (excerpt): “The point isn’t what…
Discipline for stepparents
The Love and Logic Institute issued its weekly email newsletter with help for stepparents feeling the need to discipline stepchildren. The four tips flow from the Love and Logic consultant style of parenting (fully documented in the many resources available…
Happy Marriage: Got to admit it’s getting better
CNNasked if your marriage was making you sick and then provided tips for getting better. Elizabeth Cohen writes (excerpt): 1. Argue well [“What really matters is the quality of your arguments.”] 2. Your spouse is annoying — accept it! [“[W]hen…
Just how temporary is the custody awarded to Michael Jackson’s mother?
The New York Times adds a little context to the looming custody issues following Michael Jackson’s death and the apparent change of heart by Debbie Rowe toward 12-year-old Michael Joseph Jackson Jr. and 11-year-old Paris Michael Katherine Jackson, 11. [An…
Fatherhood: having the courage to raise a child
Parade Magazine shares some fatherly advice from our President. President Barack Obama writes (excerpt): . . . When we work hard, treat others with respect, spend within our means, and contribute to our communities, those are the lessons our children…
Today is your lucky day & you can’t control it!
CNN shows us the difference between controlling the outcome and controlling how we face the outcome. Peter Bregman writes (excerpt): So here’s the good news: You can change your results by changing your mind-set. When Dweck trained children to view…
Losing an honorable man: Judge Michael Smolenski
The Grand Rapids Press reports on the passing of Judge Michael Smolenski, 64, who died from a rare neurological disease. Nardy Baeza Bickel writes (excerpt): Rretired Michigan Appeals Court Judge Michael Smolenski passed away Saturday night after battling a rare…
Trial v. settlement: How often is a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush?
The New York Times reminds us that trial is inherently uncertain, a gamble that often does not payoff. The study to be published in September’s Journal of Empirical Legal Studies showed that 61 percent of plaintiffs who rejected settlement offers…
Hey Guys, Let’s Evolve: Stop Acting Out Sexually and Violently
I keep finding news of males acting out sexually and violently. It seems that guys get bad news for such behavior. The news gets degendered and reported as criminal behavior by offenders. Men aren’t born to commit such acts, but the…
Death of Grand Rapids Service to the Profession Award Winner [Western Michigan Federal Bar Association]
Obituary for Judge Stephen Karr Judge Stephen W. Karr, died on September 28, 2007. He was born on the Island of Samos, Greece on June 20, 1919, and emigrated to the United States with his parents, William and Angeline Karr,…
Another victim of domestic violence
The Grand Rapids Press reports on the death of Leontyne “Tina” Partee-Elder, a lawyer with “‘such a big heart.’” Barton Deiters writes (excerpt): As an attorney, Leontyne “Tina” Partee-Elder represented some of the most hardened criminal offenders in the system.…
“HELP, I Need Someone…”, the new chorus line for men in the new millenium
In July 2007, the Grand Rapids, Michigan community was witness to four lives lost due to domestic violence. Three murders and one suicide asked families, schools, churches, neighborhoods, and the community at large to make sense of the violence around…
Learning from the contentious divorce of former Governor James E. McGreevey
The AP/New York Times peeks into the divorce proceedings involving the former Governor of New Jersey. The short piece illustrates common themes, including: –judges want parents to use “common sense” –judges want parents to facilitate age-appropriate activities –judges want parents…
The Day the Powerlessness of Cho Died
This was a young man drowning in lonliness, despair, and powerlessness. He didn’t want to face another day of this misery, so he escaped in a morbid and violent hyper-masculine fantasy. This fantasy came to fruition on a dreadful day…
Helping: It takes Guts and Grace
It was a warm, sunny evening. I felt safely enveloped by the cozy surroundings of Empire along the Lake Michigan shoreline. Escaping to the Leelanau Peninsula; a pilgrimage my wife Stephanie and I take often, since honeymooning there some 19…
OJ’s “I Did It” propels “If I Did It”
As a psychologist, I’ve done hundreds of assessments for men who batter. When I determine after careful discernment of the data presented that a particular man has a problem with abusive behavior, one personality factor speaks loudly. Men who batter lack empathy. …