Written on
January 11, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
The Michigan court of appeals is publishing ESTATE OF CHERYL A. ROWLEY a/k/a CHERYL A. MAC INNES, v. JOE DEE MAC INNES (January 8, 2004, Case No. 241649). A waiver of life insurance proceeds in a consent judgment of divorce releases the former spouse’s rights. Neff writes (excerpt):
Defendant appeals by delayed leave an order of the trial court directing him to pay over to plaintiff $95,000 in life insurance proceeds he received upon the death of his former wife, Cheryl Rowley, where she failed to change the beneficiary designation on her life insurance policy after the couple’s divorce. The court concluded that a provision in the consent judgment of divorce, releasing all rights of either party to the proceeds of any life insurance on the other, waived defendant’s right to Rowley’s life insurance proceeds. We affirm.
***
Having concurred with the majority view in the federal circuits and concluded that giving effect to the above provision does not compromise the purpose and goals of ERISA, Melton, supra at 945, we hold that defendant waived his rights to the life insurance proceeds at issue and thus is not entitled to retain them. The above provision is all-inclusive with regard to defendant’s relinquishment of his right to life insurance proceeds from policies owned by his former wife: “[E]xcept as otherwise provided, all rights . . . to the proceeds of any policy . . . of life insurance . . . shall hereupon become and be payable to the estate of the owner of said policy . . . ” This language is explicit in its intent to divest defendant of his interest in life insurance proceeds from policies owned by Rowley. Thomas v Detroit Retirement System, 246 Mich App 155, 160-161; 631 NW2d 349 (2001); Massachusetts Indemnity, supra at 268; see also Clift, supra (no “magic words” necessary for effective waiver). In our view, giving effect to the waiver best serves the ends of justice where a divorcing couple’s intent is clear. Silber, supra at 403-404.
We find no merit in defendant’s argument that the trial court erroneously viewed the consent judgment of divorce as a contract. As the trial court recognized, a divorce judgment entered by consent is in the nature of a contract, and a settlement agreement, i.e., a stipulation and property settlement, is a contract . . . .
Posted in Law: Cases/Statutes 
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Written on
January 11, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
The New York TImes shows the new approach to public service ads targeted at kids. Shaila K. Dewan writes (excerpt):
The campaign is different from those that have gone before it. It does not try to shame the viewer into action. There are no scare tactics that end in the coffins or graves. This is not your brain on drugs. Nor does it emphasize a positive message – snowboarding as the anti-drug, say – that might seem out of reach to its target audience.
Like its precursors in the squeamish 1950’s, the wised-up 1970’s, the fearful “Just Say No” and let’s-hear-nothing-else-about-it 1980’s, the “Face the Issue” campaign reflects its time. Brutally frank and uncomfortably intimate, it delves into a world in which young people grow up faster, are more sophisticated and, statistics show, are increasingly diagnosed as troubled. Perhaps more important, rather than appeal to parents, it asks young people to take action themselves. Each message ends with the words: “Your choice.”
The 30-second spots, made at cost with the stars donating their time, have been shown on MTV, the WB and other networks. An important component is the corresponding Web site, www.facetheissue.com, a sort of online group therapy session whose users post messages about their problems. The day after the campaign began in late October, the site got 300,000 hits. As of last week, two million people had visited.
***
In the 1990’s, research showed that parents are far more effective messengers. New slogans urged parents to talk to their children about drugs and sex.
But an obstacle for teens with eating disorders or drug problems, several experts said, is their parents’ denial. A child may not have anorexia but still have serious food-related problems, said Susan Smalley, a psychiatry professor at the University of California at Los Angeles who studies such disorders. “The site is tapping into that group of children and adolescents that aren’t being identified,” she said.
Peggy Conlon, the president of the Ad Council, said that one way to change behavior is to change what is considered normal. She points to the Legacy Foundation’s antismoking ads, showing children ambushing tobacco executives with tough questions. “They’re making kids appear smart if they resist smoking,” she said.
“Face the Issue” grapples with another issue: what to do when low self-confidence and eating disorders seem to be the norm.
“There is no magic wand, ‘Oh, do this and it’s all going to be fine,’ ” said Ms. Semel. “The whole point was not to make the issues so negative. To take the stigma away from it and just make it like anything else in life, something you should deal with.”
Posted in Families/Children No Comments »
Written on
January 10, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
The Michigan Supreme Court issued Order 2003-22 (12/23/2003), stating that the Friend of the Court (FOC) should adopt the proposed substantive revisions to the Michigan Child Support Formula relating to:
1. Determining medical support and health care coverage obligations.
2. Setting child support before determining spousal support obligations.
3. Deviating from the formula.
These amendments will be effective October 1, 2004.
The court did not order any other amendments, including those proposals relating to changes in the shared economic responsibility formula.
Posted in Procedures/Rules No Comments »
Written on
January 9, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
ABCnews’s Working Wounded column features tips on finding forgiveness. While the focus on the column is our work lives, the principles are equally applicable to our home lives.
Bob Rosner writes (excerpt):
Say that you are sorry. You’ll never go wrong when you start your apology with, “I’m sorry.” It’s amazing how much healing can come from those two simple words. The longer you talk before you say you’re sorry, the greater the risk that they won’t believe that you really are. So always lead with the most important part of the apology.
Admit that you were wrong. Have you ever had someone say that they were apologizing to you but it sounded like they were really blaming you for what happened? Talk about fanning the flames. That’s why it’s so important to clearly say that you were wrong; “It was wrong for me to take a long lunch when we’re so far behind.”
Acknowledge the problems you caused. Acknowledging the problems that were caused by your actions shows the apologizee that you really understand the problems you made for them. This can be quite painful, but it should make a huge difference in how the person you are apologizing to feels about your apology. You don’t have to go into agonizing detail, just say enough to show them that you tried to see it all through their eyes. For example, “I should have never left work early the day before a sales presentation. I realize it created a lot of extra work for you.”
Show them that you learned from the situation. Let the person know you won’t repeat the error by telling them exactly what you’ll do to keep it from happening again (for example, “From now on I’ll ask your opinion before I make a commitment to a customer”). Another way to accomplish this is to make a joke, at your own expense of course, about what happened. Proceed down this path with caution, however; you can make things worse if they think you aren’t taking the apology seriously. On the other hand, a little self-deprecating humor can go a long way toward allowing you to work together comfortably in the future.
Posted in Relationships No Comments »
Written on
January 9, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
CNN reports on a water department’s efforts to save marriages. The Reuters item says (excerpt):
Couples in the Philippine capital of Manila could find themselves in hot water after being asked to start sharing the tub at bath time as part of a conservation drive.
“Start sharing baths with your partner to conserve water,” the environment department has advised the parched capital’s 12 million residents.
Unseasonably dry weather has depleted water levels in the main reservoirs supplying the metropolis and officials were meeting on Friday to consider rationing and other measures.
Posted in Something Different No Comments »
Written on
January 8, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
ABCnews shows seven ways to get your finances in order for 2004. Jonathan P. Decker of the Christian Science Monitor discusses these tips:
1. Get serious about saving [IRAs, 401(k) and other tax-deferred income]
2. Diversify your portfolio [allocate your money between stocks, bonds, and cash]
3. Refinance your mortgage
4. Time your car purchases [cut a deal at the end of the month or the end of summer]
5. Update your insurance
6. Reduce credit-card debt
7. Take advantage of new tax breaks [401(k)s, capital gains, child tax credits]
Posted in Finances/Tax No Comments »
Written on
January 7, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
The Grand Rapids Press shows the difference between counties in how the law is applied. Doug Guthrie writes (excerpt):
New rules from Michigan’s Supreme Court requiring attorneys to visit with juveniles they represent in adoption and child protective cases are being accepted as already-routine practice in Kent County.
But some lawyers practicing in Detroit-area juvenile courts are angry and have threatened to refuse appointments as lawyer-guardians ad litem.
The different reactions, according to local lawyers, state officials and the chief judge of Kent County’s Family Court, show the stark difference between priorities on the needs of juveniles in West Michigan and those in the southeastern part of the state.
***
The American Bar Association recommends no lawyer’s guardian ad litem caseload should exceed 40 cases.
Debra Gutierrez-McGuire, special assistant on foster-care issues to state Supreme Court Chief Justice Maura Corrigan, said, “Two hundred cases per year for some attorneys is pretty average here. Some could handle 300 to 350.” Gutierrez-McGuire said it was not unusual for her to carry 375 cases while working at Wayne County Legal Aid. She said the office’s 19 lawyers handled 25 percent of the state’s entire caseload.
“The practices may vary from county to county, but the bottom line is meeting the needs of children and guaranteeing they have a voice in court,” Gutierrez-McGuire said.
Nanaruth Carpenter, chief judge of Kent County’s Family Court, said she feels fortunate that kind of caseload never has existed here. She vowed it never will.
“I have felt consistently that our county commissioners are supportive of providing for children in the system,” Carpenter said. “When I talk about services we have available in this county, people are amazed and jealous and comment they wish they could provide for children and families as we do.”
The rules, which went into effect Jan. 1, require attorneys who represent children to submit an affidavit swearing they visited their clients before each hearing. Lawyers also would be required to meet with their clients at least every three months. They also will be discouraged from substituting for one another without becoming familiar with the case.
Family court judges and referees now will ask the lawyers whether those visits took place with a goal of shortening delays in cases of children under family court jurisdiction. The courts also are ordered to give child welfare cases the highest possible priority.
Lawyer David Murkowski said Kent County’s lawyers are accustomed to providing that information without being asked. Carpenter said in her 13 years on Kent County’s bench, she has had to warn a lawyer to visit a child client only “once in a blue moon.”
Posted in Procedures/Rules No Comments »
Written on
January 7, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
STATE OF MICHIGAN
IN THE CIRCUIT COURT FOR THE COUNTY OF KENT
IN RE: POLICY ON SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBERS ADMINISTRATIVE POLICY 2004-01
At a session of said Court, held in the Kent County Courthouse
in the City of Grand Rapids, in said County on
January 2, 2004
Present: HON. PAUL J. SULLIVAN
Chief Circuit Judge
WHEREAS, in order to protect the confidentiality of the social security numbers of parties
to a lawsuit filed in this court, and pursuant to MCR 3.206(B) for domestic relations actions:
IT IS HEREBY ORDERED, that the following protocol regarding the confidentiality of
social security numbers is adopted as the policy of this Court.
For domestic relations actions, social security numbers will be provided to the friend of the court
and the other party in the verified statement. The verified statement must be attached to the
copies of the papers served on the other party and provided to the friend of the court. Because
MCR 3.206(B)(2) specifically identifies information contained in the verified statement as
confidential, it is not to be attached to or included with the papers filed with the court.
Attorneys and parties are directed to refrain from including the social security number of any party
or interested person in pleadings or papers filed with the court. Social security numbers may not
be included in orders or judgments entered by the court. Parties may move for the disclosure of
another party or person’s social security number in the event that the social security number is
necessary for purposes related to the litigation. The court may order the disclosure of the social
security number directly to the other party or designated agency. The court file shall not contain
the social security number.
The Clerk of the Court is hereby directed to redact social security numbers that may appear on
the face of a pleading, and is authorized to redact social security numbers found in pleadings or
other papers filed with the Clerk.
PAUL J. SULLIVAN
__________________________________
Paul J. Sullivan, Chief Circuit Judge
Posted in Procedures/Rules No Comments »
Written on
January 7, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
Men’s Health sets forth 52 ways to “Jumpstart Your Life.” Steve Calechman’s list includes (excerpt):
1. Let go of all the things you keep saying you’re going to do.
The unwritten book, the unfinished chair, the dusty French-language tapes. If you can’t devote 15 minutes a day, drop it, says Neil Fiore, Ph.D., author of The Now Habit: Overcoming Procrastination with Guilt-Free Play. You don’t have time for everything. Use your time for things that you can commit to starting today. There. You’re free.
***
5. This week at the office, arrive 45 minutes early and stay 15 minutes late.
Use the 45 to knock one big thing off your daily agenda, and the 15 to plan out tomorrow. It’s 1 extra hour a day, 5 hours a week–and if you keep it up, nearly 1 extra month of work a year. You’ll undergo your own productivity boost by tapping into your best morning energy, and end the day with a burst of organization. Workers are most productive in the early hours of the day, according to a survey of more than 1,000 wage slaves. Increase your a.m. effectiveness now and use the drive home to start planning how you’ll spend the raise you get. For instance . . .
6. Plan vacations for the next 3 years.
If you’re lacking inspiration, visit travelzoo.com; and under “Vacation Specials,” click “Exotic & Fantasy.” Sydney in ‘05. Bora Bora in ‘06. Albany in ‘07. A study by the State University of New York found that men who took a yearly vacation reduced their risk of dying of cardiovascular disease.
***
11. Update your resume.
Even if you’re not looking for a job. You’ll remember what you like and what you’re missing, and it’ll make you consider: Is this still the place for me, or is it time to move on? One study found that men who use this kind of “research therapy” have more confidence in their work and in future career decision making.
12. Get all that crap off your desk.
Most men are drowning in paper and good intentions. Create a tray for reading material and limit the quantity to whatever fits inside. If you haven’t read it in a week, toss it. (Exception: original copies of the Declaration of Independence.) “No one will ever read as much information as they’re interested in,” says Julie Morgenstern, author of Organizing from the Inside Out. Then block off a realistic period of time each day to read, and stick to it.
***
19. Fire up your relationship with your old man.
But not over a latte. Meet him at his place and time. And realize that the Big Talk may never happen, says Amy Bassell Crowe, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in Menlo Park, California. As for what to do, focus on something that he gave you. If he taught you how to drive, rent a car from his era and pick him up. It takes more than one spin in a ‘57 Chevy to bond permanently, but just let him know there’s room for him in your life.
***
25. Send an e-mail to someone you’re estranged from.
Getting in touch will short-circuit the anxiety and defuse the buildup of cortisol in your brain, which negatively impacts mental health, Love says. You don’t have to make amends. Just say hi. Research also shows that heart-attack patients who forgive their trespassers reduce their odds of dying of heart disease.
***
31. Take your kids on a bike ride.
You win: Intensify your workout by challenging your kids to mini races–from tree to mailbox. They win: A study by the American Dietetic Association shows that parents have the greatest potential to influence children to make good health choices. Lead by example.
32. Reread five books you read in college.
No, the Madden ‘94 instruction manual doesn’t count. Challenging books help protect against future memory decline, according to a study done in New York City. Reading old texts might also reintroduce you to your revolutionary, visionary, college self and remind you of what you really wanted to be when you grew up.
***
37. Change the way you walk into a room.
Know as much as you can about who’s in the room, and enter it appropriately and with purpose, says Tracy Penticuff, a senior consultant at The Professional Image in Atlanta. And then seal the connections. Shake hands, acknowledge each person, and hold eye contact long enough to know someone’s eye color. You’ll create connections and be remembered.
38. When you’re waiting to cross the street, in line for coffee, or in a crowd waiting for the train, talk to somebody.
Even if you think you just want some peace and quiet, striking up a conversation will leave you feeling better. A study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology shows that acting extroverted–being talkative, adventurous, and assertive–has a positive effect on mood, even if you’re not gregarious by nature.
***
40. Volunteer 2 hours a week.
Yeah, you’ll be helping others, yada yada yada. More important: You’ll meet people who aren’t like you. According to research at the University of Toronto, making new contacts leads to a healthier, more successful life, thanks to exposure to new ideas and networks.
***
43. Go on a date with your wife.
But not just to the local sushi hut. Find a quiet place with a big view; it encourages a larger perspective, says Peter Pearson, Ph.D., director of the Couples Institute in Menlo Park, California. Discuss what you want to create together. It’s like a brainstorming meeting with no bad ideas. The only off-limits question: How are you gonna do that? There’ll come a time for critical or analytical thinking, but not during this conversation. After everything’s come out, let it sit for a week or two, then revisit and see what’s still exciting. Do this once a year and take notes. Look at it as goal setting for the relationship.
44. Take a 3-day weekend.
Research at Michigan State University showed that workers who could keep their professional and private lives separate were more successful in both areas. So sleep in, eat out, and act lackadaisical. And do absolutely nothing work-related for at least 72 hours, says Brian Tracy, author of Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life. No computer, no e-mail, no phone. Even 5 minutes of work brings stress. It’s like leaving a car’s interior light on–that little bulb drains the battery. Commit to relaxing and you’ll be recharged when you return to work.
45. Yank your teenage son out of bed early and get him into the car before he has time to think.
Go have breakfast or watch the sunrise–just get out of town so he can’t play the resistant boy. While his outside may say he doesn’t want to be around Dad, his inside really does, says Crowe. Ask him about his life. And don’t try to empathize by saying, “I know what that’s like.” It’ll make him feel as if his troubles are commonplace, and you may, in fact, not know what it’s like for him at all. Share your experiences and let him make the connections.
46. Spend 15 minutes a day wasting your coworkers’ time.
Talk about the ball game, ask about their kids, make plans for lunch. It may seem as if you’re slacking, but in reality, you’re becoming a better worker. Studies show that people with friends at work are better communicators (which is good for productivity, which is good for the boss, which is good for your career).
***
49. Play Zelda with your kids.
Not only will this augment bonding time and increase your cool points, but one study found that playing action video games improves your ability to pay attention to detail. As a result, you’re more likely to notice the little details in life.
***
52. Climb up that ladder.
Climb back down. Climb up again, with your wife holding on firmly at the bottom, until you’re no longer afraid to get to the top. Whatever your irrational fear, face it again and again until you’re no longer afraid. A study funded by the National Institute of Mental Health found that when rats were repeatedly placed in a frightening situation with no negative effects, their brains overwrote the fear.
Posted in Something Different No Comments »
Written on
January 7, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
Checklists
GENERAL PRINCIPLES OF TRIAL ADVOCACY:
1. Be prepared.
2. Know your basic theories and be consistent and comprehensive with your theory of proof.
3. Prepare your witnesses.
4. Organize your file.
5. Get to the point and get out.
6. Be yourself.
7. Be civil and do not condescend.
8. Command attention and communicate conviction.
9. Understand the social setting.
10. Know your adversary.
11. Know the judge and jury to the extent possible.
12. Understand the legal framework of your case.
13. Consider the sequence of presentation at trial.
14. Be alert and react immediately.
Posted in Persuasion/Advocacy No Comments »
Written on
January 6, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
ABCnews carries the Christian Science Monitor article, “Churches Work to Welcome Singles.” G. Jeffrey MacDonald writes (excerpt):
Across the nation, religious communities of varied stripes are taking steps to welcome the growing the number adults who have chosen ? at least for now ? not to marry.
According to U.S. Census projections, singles will constitute nearly one-third of American households by 2010. Already, the nation’s 86 million unmarried adults make up 42 percent of the workforce and 35 percent of voters.
Conversely, the most recent Census numbers show that married-couple households have dropped from nearly 80 percent in the 1950s to just 50.7 percent today.
The demographic shift means a vast cultural challenge for family-centered institutions to embrace everyone from young adults postponing nuptials, to divorcees choosing singleness, to widows and widowers who have lived with a partner for years.
As congregations adjust, singles ministries with a match-making undertone are giving way to new projects meant to weave individuals into the wider fabric of community life. But whether these single lifestyles are being blessed, tolerated, or gently criticized varies largely along regional and denominational lines.
“I will probably leave this church the day we announce we’re having a singles ministry function,” says the Rev. Marc Dickmann, pastor of Commitment at Warehouse 242, an evangelical church in Charlotte, N.C. “Our vision of community is not one of ostracizing or isolating single people as lost souls. The attitude of churches used to be: ‘You aren’t married. What’s wrong with you?’ But we know it doesn’t work that way for everybody.”
***
As congregations seek new ways to bring singles into their mainstreams, the challenge yet to be surmounted is how much a community will acknowledge or accept about a single person’s personal life. At Warehouse 242, singles who cohabitate may take part in church life but are forbidden to lead small groups, since their lives fall short of church standards. By contrast, at Christ Church United, an unmarried couple may have a child baptized as long as they agree to join the church. No commitment toward marriage is expected, McDaniel says, because “sometimes it isn’t a good relationship, but we still put the child first” by welcoming a bond with the church through baptism.
So far, singles are often being welcomed in communities across the religious spectrum along the lines of a “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy about personal lifestyles. But whether the probing goes deeper with time or not, the process of discovery for what makes for a holy single life in the 21st century will surely be lived out in settings where married couples and single people explore the depths of faith side-by-side.
Posted in Relationships No Comments »
Written on
January 6, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
Compare the two love stories reported this week.
Everyone knows that Britney Spears married Jason Allan Alexander on a Saturday, then had the marriage annulled on a Monday.
CNN included quotes like:
“And we were just looking at each other and said, ‘Let’s do something wild, crazy. Let’s go get married, just for the hell of it.’ ”
They “did not know each other’s likes and dislikes.”
“Upon learning of each other’s desires, they are so incompatible that there was a want of understanding of each other’s actions in entering into this marriage.”
Britney “lacked understanding of her actions.”
They “took a joke too far.”
Also this week,
CNN explained how a Morrocan soldier, Abderrahim, had been captured by separatist guerrillas in 1979 during a war for control of the Western Sahara territory. They freed him along with other prisoners in November.
What was Abderrahim thinking? “I was convinced she’d wait for me, I had blind confidence in her since the first day we met.”
What was his fiancee thinking? Bahia knew he had been captured. She had periodic news of him, but had heard nothing for six years. Still, “I never thought I had lost my husband. I knew he’d come back one day. I never showed pain but hid it deep in my heart.”
Posted in Relationships No Comments »
Written on
January 5, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
The Detroit News discusses the 25 cent increase in the child support processing fee and everyone offering their own two bits on the subject.
Judy Putnam writes (excerpt):
Those paying child support will have to dig a tiny bit deeper in 2004, in a move that’s angering noncustodial parents and fathers’ rights groups.
The state will increase a monthly child support processing fee by 25 cents in January to generate new money for the state Attorney General’s Office, said Daniel Wright, director of the Michigan Supreme Court Friend of the Court Bureau.
The fee went into effect Oct. 1, but the state did not have the computer system ready to collect the fee, Wright said.
Lawmakers, looking for a way to boost Attorney General Mike Cox’s child support collection efforts, earmarked the fees for his office rather than the Friend of the Court office. Finishing his first year in office, Cox carved out a role in child support collection by focusing on tough cases involving wealthy parents behind in child support.
Posted in Procedures/Rules No Comments »
Written on
January 4, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
The New York Times explains how some parent-child conversations are becoming “Instant, and Online.” John Schwartz writes (excerpt):
And now, as families own more than one computer, the machines spread beyond the den and home networks relying on wireless connections become increasingly popular, instant messaging is taking root within the home itself.
Although it might seem lazy or silly to send electronic messages instead of getting out of a chair and walking into the next room, some psychologists say that the role of the technology within families can be remarkably positive. In many cases, they say, the messages are helping to break down the interpersonal barriers that often prevent open communication.
“Conversation between parents and teenagers could be highly emotional and not necessarily productive,” said Elisheva F. Gross, a psychology researcher at the Children’s Digital Media Center at the University of California at Los Angeles. When young people are online, however, “it’s their turf,” she said. “It may be a way for parents to communicate in a language and in a space that their children are more comfortable with.”
Teenagers already use online communications to take on difficult topics with one another, said Katelyn McKenna, a research assistant professor in psychology at New York University. Preliminary results from a study she conducted last year, she said, suggest that “they are able to talk with one another about issues that bother them more readily online than when they are talking face to face.”
***
Ms. Parsonnet, a psychotherapist, said that the online back channel strips away some of the parts of face-to-face communication that complicate matters: “They don’t see your face turning red,” she said. “They don’t see you turning cross — all the things that will shut them up immediately.”
***
While even quicker than e-mail, instant messages also have the advantage of not actually being instant, Ms. Parsonnet said, because the medium at least gives the user time to compose his or her thoughts and comments before hitting the button.
“You know all the times you wish you’d counted to 10 before you said something?” she said with a laugh. With instant messages, she said, “You have a built-in counting-to-10.”
Posted in Families/Children 1 Comment »
Written on
January 2, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
CNN reports on a Lincoln, Illinois wedding performed at a hospital emergency room (excerpt):
“As I laid in the emergency room, we tried to decide who else we could get to do the ceremony. Then the bride and groom arrived and said ‘We don’t want anyone else to do it,”‘ said Hoover, pastor of Lincoln Bible Church.
Hoover isn’t surprised the couple was so adamant. The bride, Janel Hoover, is his cousin’s daughter. Ed Tibbits, the groom, has been a family friend for about seven years.
“We pulled the curtains aside and made room for 10 or 12 people. They weren’t dressed up at all — some wore jeans and others were in sweats. It was a spur of the moment thing,” Hoover said.
Posted in Relationships No Comments »
Written on
January 2, 2004
by
David C. Sarnacki
USA Today’s Olivia Barker notes the increasing length of engagements (excerpt):
The average American engagement has stretched to a leisurely 16 months, up from 11 months in 1990, according to a recent survey by the Condé Nast Bridal Infobank. (In Canada, the trip down the aisle takes 14 months, according to WeddingBells magazine.) The New Milford, Conn.-based Association of Bridal Consultants puts the number at 15 or 16 months; National Jeweler, a trade publication, says 16. The Condé Nast study also says that 19% of engagements occur in December, far more than in any other month, as ring boxes get opened on Christmas and New Year’s Eve.
White says requests to officiate at weddings in 2005 already are common.
The rise seems surprising, considering other marriage trends, namely that newlyweds are older and ostensibly more secure: The groom’s median age is 26.9; the bride’s is 25.3, according to 2002 figures from the U.S. Census Bureau. Longer engagements made sense when a groom popped the question at age 18 or 20 to his first serious girlfriend. They also made sense when couples intended to marry right out of college, when finding jobs was paramount to planning a wedding.
Instead, the increasing length of today’s engagements reflects the increasing personalization of weddings. Couples, especially urban sophisticates, want a particular venue during a particular season (popular sites can get booked more than a year in advance), a particular band, a particular photographer — all, of course, at a particularly good price.
Posted in Relationships No Comments »
Written on
December 31, 2003
by
David C. Sarnacki
MSN/Today/Money highlights end of year tax tips. Jean Sherman Chatzky’s tips to save on taxes include:
Give to charity
Sell losing stocks to offset gains
Beef up deductions
Put away money for your kids
Open a Keogh
Spend flexible spending dollars
Get to work on those taxes (refunds)
Posted in Finances/Tax No Comments »
Written on
December 31, 2003
by
David C. Sarnacki
Business 2.0features Anne Schukat’s article “Kung Fu Secrets of the PowerPoint Masters.” These tips are useful to keep in mind when preparing demonstrative evidence for motions, ADR or trial (excerpt):
1 Stun them with wordplay.
Using PowerPoint as a TelePrompTer guarantees a boring show. So don’t read your slides. They are a visual punctuation for the audience, not note cards for the speaker, says Jere King, Cisco’s vice president for corporate communications services. Other pros like to announce that they’ll provide handouts after the presentation — so the crowd will listen instead of taking notes.
2 Beware the fonts of fury.
For consistency, stick with a limited number of fonts and a standard color palette, perhaps based on your corporate identity, says Nancy Duarte of Duarte Design. Placing your logo in a corner of the slides reinforces your brand, she adds, but keep it unobtrusive.
3 Plot your moves craftily.
Tell a compelling story with each slide, advises Geetesh Bajaj, founder of PowerPoint website Indezine.com and officially recognized by Microsoft as a guru. Start with a conflict, an obstacle, or a question, then show the audience how your approach will solve the problem. Take a cue from filmmaking and plan your slides in storyboard format; that way you can perfect the plotline and ensure continuity.
4 Illuminate your words.
Talking about pollution? “Show me a photo of a bunch of dead birds, some smog, even a diseased lung,” says Seth Godin, author of Really Bad PowerPoint (And How to Avoid It). Images are more memorable. Use them to illustrate complex technologies, along with graphs and pie charts for financials. Cliff Atkinson of presentation design company Sociable Media suggests you use photos from an archiver like Corbis.com or designs from your company’s creative services department.
5 Make brevity a virtue.
You may have to think more like the editor of a tabloid newspaper. Jerry Weissman, author of Presenting to Win, advises that you treat your bullet points as headlines and cut out needless prepositions, articles, and conjunctions. Use large type — nothing smaller than 24 point — and stay away from sentences longer than one line. And don’t be afraid to use a little blank space — you don’t need to fill every square inch.
6 Control your impulse to go Hollywood.
“It’s easy to get carried away with PowerPoint’s animation and multimedia capabilities,” admits Rick Altman, host of user conference PowerPoint Live. But flashy moves are no substitute for good taste or rigorous thought. The use of music clips, video, and animation should be reserved for special emphasis or potentially convoluted explanations, such as demonstrating how data flows across a network. Otherwise, you’re just creating sensory overload.
7 Be at peace.
Don’t rush through your slide show, Weissman says. Leave images up on the screen long enough for impact — say, 30 seconds to two minutes, depending on the slide. Always make sure you have enough time to make your point and answer questions. Should you need to jump ahead or backward during the presentation, you can simply type in a slide number and hit “Enter.”
Posted in Persuasion/Advocacy No Comments »
Written on
December 30, 2003
by
Andrea Prince Karsten
Wachovia forecaster and strategist, Rod Smyth, writes in this weeks edition that 2003 was a year when the stock market and the economy accelerated to above average growth rates. In our opinion 2004, will see those rates level off. Read further about which market sectors are likely to outperform and which are likely to underperform…
Posted in Finances/Tax No Comments »
Written on
December 30, 2003
by
David C. Sarnacki
The New York Times carries Ira Glass’s account of his psychologist-mother’s life, the “Doctor of Daillance” who studied extramarital affairs (excerpt):
What she discovered in those first surveys was later confirmed in her work with the hundreds of couples she counseled: when a person cheats, it doesn’t mean there’s a problem in the marriage. Over half of the men and a third of the women who had had affairs said they were happy with their spouses.
***
But to her, an affair was more like a medical condition: it followed predictable rules and was perfectly preventable, if you recognized the early signs. Sadly, not many people did. As more women made it into the workplace as equals with men, more than half of the affairs my mom encountered started on the job. Women and men in happy marriages, not intending to cheat, got close to someone at work, sharing confidences and intimacies, until they fell in love. The cheating spouses sometimes seemed as confused as their partners at how it happened.
When had they crossed the line? Not when they finally kissed, my mom said. In a sense the sex was just the endgame. They crossed the line when the married person began confiding in the friend at work. When you entrust what you really think to someone outside the marriage, when your friend knows more about your marriage than your spouse knows about your friend, you’ve gone too far.
Posted in Relationships No Comments »
